Coming back to the subject of ceremony with medicine, I’ve heard of a few cases of whimsical usage of the medicine and thus some perspectives to be tainted. Of course, it’s not going to be for everyone and it’s important that you must know your Shaman is someone you can trust – word of mouth generally offers a good recommendation..
I wrote in my previous plant medicine blog about my first retreat drinking the sacred vine, as known as Ayahuasca (along with it’s counter part the Chacruna leaf), to induce a healing from the inside out. This healing is usually accompanied by a felt sense (felt differently for each individual) of el madre, or ‘the mother’ which is one of the effects of the medicine going to work on your physical, emotional, spiritual, and or other bodies of your existence.
This most recent experience again has served me kindly and gently, after 4 cups (usually 1 or 2 is enough..) of the not so pleasant tasting medicine, I found myself once again on a journey, a journey of my body. It’s never hit me with explosive vomiting or toileting as means of the releasing; my purging again this time being based on movement and laughter.. Having been guided by the shaman, who was new to me, my depth of appreciation for this +2000 year old ceremony has once again grown..
I could feel the medicine working in my stomach and intestines; for the whole duration I felt nauseous, perhaps sometimes before one is ready to purge one’s bowels the medicine and moment has to be right.. As told by the shaman that it’s probably only a matter time, perhaps more work needs to be undone on my path before the medicine is ready to help me release my gastro associated workings.. The geometric patterns, stars on the ceiling and overwhelming sense that in every moment ANYTHING is possible; the squirming, leg shaking, finger twisting, skull exploring motions that again wouldn’t let my body sit still like most other internally journeying participants.. All for my interpretation pointing to the fact I’m in exactly the right field of work, with a need to further explore the physical! But there’s something in my guts still not budging..
Makes sense if I’m 100% honest with myself, I am still exploring an interesting relationship around eating (having my Crohn’s mostly under wraps) an oral persona to play out.. I thought I could get away with once again denying to myself and others that I still have work to do here, but the medicine, the mother, knows.. I am the kind of person who craves an authentic life and the medicine has helped me to once again, shine a light on the parts of me which were being disingenuous to this treasured trait. The joy and sometimes the woe of Ayahuasca, it gives you just what you need, which may be the furthest point away from what you think you need!
May the integration of lessons continue, the real journey starts now ceremony is over!..